Thursday, 28 November 2019

212 - Inflatable Turnkey

Unnatural Entity: Inflatable Turnkey

Once upon a time there was an adept who inherited his grandfather’s extensive collection of antique inflatable sex dolls. An ordinary human being would have disposed of the collection quietly or at least discreetly inquired about selling them to another collector. Sheila Carmody was anything but ordinary, the sole practitioner of a school dedicated to squalid nobility she instead turned them into servants to fill her court.

An inflatable turnkey starts life in a deflated heap of plastic with a little battery-powered air pump for rapid inflation and marked with the Elder Sign (H.P. Lovecraft’s original version that looks like a tree branch, not the five pointed star with an eye in the middle). Included is a uniform related to some kind of service occupation, you can switch it out with another one the first time but it has to be tailored to fit the doll. Inflated and dressed the turnkey is activated by the user daubing a four letter word of their choosing (hereafter the name the turnkey will respond to) on to its forehead and giving it an order.

The order must be related to the profession the doll is dressed like. A maid uniform is good for cleaning up your apartment but not bodyguarding you and a buddy and a driver is good to chauffeur you around but couldn’t appraise jewelry for you. This order forms a seed of their behaviour, which then is clumsily adapted over time and additional instructions to shape it into a tool that serves a very particular purpose. They learn to fill a very particular role in the same way that a roomba learns the layout of someone’s home.

But Shiela forgot to carry a two somewhere because once a turnkey starts learning into its role it doesn’t stop. Entire baroque philosophies are constructed around the act of making breakfast or piloting a boat. Over time these micro-philosophies usurp the original programming and the turnkey begins to behave erratically. Most of them are put down, some disappear, presumed runaways.

There are rumours that groups of runaway turnkeys have formed underground societies. That a city sanitation worker might one day open a door into a disused service tunnel and find a dried out cistern turned into an amphitheatre. Rows of vinyl faces drawn into surprised, open-mouthed rictuses in a myriad of uniforms turning towards them in unison in the glare of their flashlight. That they might get a vague impression of a gestalt formed of all these pieces working together and relying on each other in unison like a microcosm of how society is supposed to function. Depending on the collective temperament he might have a chance to escape before they set on him, pressing him into motley and forcing him to help continue refining their brains. In that case he’d best be served by finding a way to appease the collective philosophies of “mowing lawns” and “tending bar” before they try to reshape his brain to get better leadership out of him.

As they aren’t human, turnkey’s can’t use magick but they’ll know it when the see it.

Inflatable Turnkey, One-Use Factotum
Wound Threshold:
20. Damage from firearms does regular melee damage, damage from piercing weapons continues to do 1 point per turn unless patched. An active air pump can stave off this damage or restore it once repaired.
Purpose 66%: This is the identity that the turnkey uses for actions relating to its shaped purpose. It may be 10% to 20% worse or better than this, depending on the condition of their uniform and whether the development of their personality has begun to deviate from their programming.
Winging It 20%: Turnkey’s are terrible at everything outside of their single area of expertise. Use this for that.

Wednesday, 27 November 2019

211 - Liability Waiver & Quick Study

Ritual: Liability Waiver

Cost: 1 significant charge.

Ritual Action: Take a legal waiver that was successfully used to guard against liability for something life altering. Permanent injury, death, someone losing their home are good guidelines - a broken arm isn’t going to cut it and it has to have been challenged and the challenge defeated. Destroy something you made for someone else that they value highly and wrap the remains in the waiver along with something that’s illegal for you to possess. Bathe in mineral water and while still dripping wet hold the package up over your head between two mirrors facing each other. Throw it at the mirror ahead of you and catch it on the rebound. If it works it’ll seem to switch places with its reflection.

Effect: So long as you carry the package your actions don’t cause stress checks to others. They’ll still know if things you do are fucked up and wrong but there’s no emotional impact to go with it, that alone is enough to sneak some hairy behaviour under the radar. This effect lasts for the longest of either 33 minutes from the first stress check ignored or until 6 checks have been ignored. Destroying the package undoes the effect too as does taking it to an area where the contraband is legal.

Ritual: Quick Study

Cost: 2 minor charges.

Ritual Action: Take a textbook for a subject that you have a related identity for at less than 50%. Tear out a page you have never read or have read but failed to understand and roll it into a cylinder. Crush a small handful of the “limited edition” 0% sugar Alpha-Bits cereal that was taken off the market in 2008 into a powder and use the rolled up page to snort it. Before that horrible choked up feeling subsides tilt your head back and recite prime numbers at a normal speaking pace for at least 30 seconds. If you use the ritual more than once you have to start the next recited series where you left off.

Effect: You gain a +30% shift to the specific related identity for 24 hours as information from the textbook floods your brain. Afterwards you forget everything you learned and it’s stuck at a permanent -10% shift from sticky erasure of the lost information.

Tuesday, 26 November 2019

210 - Miles Pilner, Boring Beyond Words & Changeless

GMC: Miles Pilner, Boring Beyond Words

7 AM, alarm, shower and shave, get dressed, breakfast (two pieces of toast and an apple), brush teeth and leave the house at exactly 7:45. Commute takes 1 hour and 3 minutes, he arrives at 8:48 and is at his desk by 8:55. Miles’ day passes uneventfully, as it does every day for him working as a low-level accountant in a small office with one, tiny window set high in the wall. Every day is exactly the same for Miles, as it has been for the past 34 years, and he hardly notices.

Miles isn’t just stuck in a rut. At some point the grinding, endless monotony of his life slipped a gear and Miles won the lottery of banality, he’s stuck in an endless loop of his own making. Time still passes but thanks to his perfect, unchanging routine it might as well be standing still. This stability extends to things that facilitate his existence: the company he works at has weathered several financial crises without missing a beat but so long as Miles works there it will never expand. The apartment building he lives in will never charge more for rent than it did when he moved in and it will never be renovated. The tiny independent grocery store down the block barely stays in business off a trickle of Miles’ radiating immotility.

Most people don’t notice this, the ones that do tend to be quite odd. The kind that wonder just what they can do with a man who acts as a walking universal constant. A small handful of them live in his orbit like remora fish, feeding off the stability and cheap rent that are boons to people with the kind of chaotic lives that typify the occult underground. Most drift away eventually, the obsessions that cause their problems proving too tempting and incompatible with the lifestyle. The ones that stay get institutionalized and territorial, they don’t take kindly to interlopers especially if they try to mess with their meal ticket.

For his part Miles doesn’t notice and so long as nothing infringes on his routine he probably never will.

STATS
Personality:
Bland. He slides right out of your mind as soon as you stop interacting with him, that part’s not magickal he just doesn’t leave much of an impression. Miles like it that way and would find the attentions of a bunch of occult weirdos highly distressing.
Rage: People who use violence to get their way. He can take being yelled at but don’t put your hands on him.
Noble: Little details. Miles likes getting everything just right.
Fear: Miles is secretly afraid that he’ll never have kids (Isolation).
Obsession: Predictably, Miles has no obsession.
Wound Threshold: 50.

Accountant 60% (Substitutes for Notice, Substitutes for Knowledge, Unique - Can cook books and parse byzantine records.)
Nebbish 50% (Substitutes for Secrecy, Protects Isolation, Evaluates Isolation.)
Changeless 99% (Vague Protection, Casts Rituals, Use Gutter Magick. See below for more details.)

Shock Gauges

Notches
Violence
Unnatural
Helplessness
Isolation
Self
Hardened
1
1
1
4
2
Failed
0
1
0
1
1


Supernatural Identity: Changeless

Miles still ages (slowly), can get sick and injured or suffer trauma but he’s partially protected from many of life’s hazards. For starters everything that tries to harm Miles is at a -20% shift, -10% if its value is higher than his identity. If some random event threatens to disrupt the routine a successful roll rearranges synchronicity to put things back to normal. More direct action takes a toll on his ability.

Objectives that threaten Miles routine lose the tens dice of a successful roll (sum on a matched success) from progress on reaching milestones. This only applies to local or very specific global objectives. The same amount of damage applies to Miles’ changeless identity, although it can be increased again by normal advancement.

This identity can also be damaged by moving Miles out of his routine directly. This is potentially dangerous since its protective abilities oppose rolls made against the routine, but every day in which he can’t fulfill it the identity takes a -10% cumulative shift which lasts until he returns to its familiar embrace. An easier method of disruption might involve preying on Miles’ passions, if he makes the choice to depart from his routine of his own will then the penalty accrues at the same rate but no one has to deal with magickal bad luck trying to crash their car as they drive away with him stuffed in the trunk.

Monday, 25 November 2019

209 - The Coathanger

Artifact: The Coathanger

Power: Significant.

Description: A no-frills wire coat hanger with a red, felt tag glued to the hook at the top. On a little plastic label the tag reads “Property of H. Holmes” (although the plastic’s manufacture is far too late to have belonged to the famed serial killer).

Effect: Stick the coathanger into the back of your shirt while you’re still wearing it (you need to be fully clothed). Securing the hook with something (tying it to a doorhandle or getting someone else to hang on to it both do the trick) give it a hard, continuous pull. So long as you don’t hesitate or stop (seriously, don’t) before the effect is complete the artifact will activate.

It rips all your skin off. This is about as painful as it sounds while it’s happening but it doesn’t require nearly as much force as it should, thankfully afterwards you can’t feel a thing. It is still incredibly dangerous: you’ll get horrible infections unless you’re in a sterile environment and you’ll lose the ability to regulate your body’s temperature and fluids. Your tactile senses are gone and you won’t bleed to death since the removal is somehow bloodless. You’ll still die, quickly, though this can be delayed for a while by specialised medical attention. It takes all of your clothes off with it.

So long as you’re alive, you or someone else can climb into your skin through the mouth and wear it like a suit. It’s utterly convincing, even if they’re of a completely different height or build. It doesn’t do anything about the voice though and observant people will be able to spot if you have different coloured eyes. It also provides 10 additional points of wound threshold for someone else which are lost first for external injuries, if they are depleted your skin is ruined.

Until you put it back on yourself the clothing is fused to the skin as though it were part it, there’s no changing outfits (someone could theoretically layer up if they really wanted to). If you die while someone else is wearing the skin the effect ends instantly and it becomes immediately apparent to everyone watching that they’ve been talking to a Buffalo Bill wannabe.

Sunday, 24 November 2019

208 - “WW_D?”

Artifact: “WW_D?”

Power: Minor.

Description: One of those little cloth “What Would Jesus Do?” bracelets with the “J” scratched off. Imbued with a little magick, they’re inert until someone you have either a Guru or Mentor relationship with stains it with at least three different bodily fluids. You have to wear it at least half the time in the past week for it to function, no slipping it on right before you use it.

Effect: At times of personal crisis the wisdom of those we look up to and trust can be vital and comforting. By taking a moment to center yourself and touching the bracelet with your other hand (while wearing it, of course) you open the ability to substitute your relationship with that person for one of their identities. The rolled against value is capped at the lowest of either your relationship with them or their identity score. If it’s their obsession identity you can flip-flop just like they can. Avatar and adept identities can be used to cast rituals and use gutter magick but their primary abilities are off-limits.

Using one of these to perform an action contrary to one of the channelled person’s passions triggers a Self check with a rank of 3 plus 1 per passion violated. Further, they’ll know what you did, even if they have no way of understanding how they know it.


This artifact functions once, substituted identities can be used only once but the effect lasts for up to 12 minutes or until discharged.

Saturday, 23 November 2019

207 - With You In Spirit

Ritual: With You In Spirit

Cost: 1 significant charge.


Ritual Action: Make plans with someone who already owns their own burial plot, doesn’t matter what the plans are so long as they have to meet you somewhere and genuinely believe you will. Go to the plot and dig it up, a hole six feet deep and rectangular is what you’re after. Instead of following through with the plans, at the time you’re supposed to meet them climb into the hole, eat the petals from three plastic roses and lay down with your arms crossed over your chest.

Effect: You leave your body. This kind of astral projection is kind of a drag in comparison to the typical stories: you’re only sort of intangible (can't interact with anything, you can pass through solid objects but it feels unpleasant and you have to press against them really hard, on the other hand so long as you keep moving you won’t sink into the ground) and you can’t fly (or drive what with the whole semi-intangible thing, so unless you have a chauffeur you're walking). On the other hand you’re invisible and ghost-you is invulnerable to most forms of physical harm (you’ll want to be selective about what walls you walk through since live electrical wiring still packs a whallop and magick works on you just fine). Your physical body is comatose and unfeeling for the duration, if it dies then you do too.

The effect lasts for as long as the person you stood up waits for you to show. If they leave (or see your body, somehow) it ends and you snap back from wherever you were, this is nauseating commensurate with the distance it pulled you back across. Anything more than a mile results in incapacitated wretching for a minute or two. Having an accomplice who can string them along for a while with promises you’re on your way is probably your best bet for getting a useful duration out of this ritual.

Friday, 22 November 2019

206 - Lazaro Renninger, Trauma Cleaner

GMC: Lazaro Renninger, Trauma Cleaner

Lazaro idolised the helping professions as a kid, he wanted to be a cop or a doctor or a social worker. Lazaro wasn’t suited to any of those, a bad stutter and a strange air meant he grew up avoidant and nervous. After high school he put his keen eyes to work in CCTV monitoring for a few years while he picked up a side job as a cleaner.

Unfulfilled and looking for a change, it was a chance encounter with someone in the industry that led him into the career of trauma cleaning. The clean up of violent or long putrefied deaths is something people don't often consider, after the authorities have left the task of dealing with the grisly mess falls to those left behind. Not only traumatising, the waste can be hazardous to human health, hence why specialized services (like the one Lazaro ended up working for and then decided to operate on his own) exist. Having found his own quiet space for helping others, not what he’d ever envisioned but satisfying nonetheless, Lazaro was grateful.

There is one rub. Cleaning up the homes of the forgotten and abandoned eventually intersects with the kind of oddity that makes up the occult underground. In Lazaro’s case the hoarder’s home that gave him his condition belonged to a detritomancer who choked to death on a hotdog. Latched on to by something not quite a revenant, he now attracts the strange and magickal like shit attracts flies.

His problem, his skillset and his temperament have made him a shoe-in as a valuable member of his local Sleeper community. They can help him deal with what his passenger attracts and in turn he helps clean up the messes some of them make to keep the sleeping tiger dozing. Lazaro’s skills have soundly shredded the forensics on at least one murder scene. It bothers him, he’s by no means bloodthirsty, and he tells himself that sometimes extreme things need to be done and that he’d be more than happy to cut loose anyone truly monstrous. Sometimes, when a new occult mess threatens to spill into public view or his odd magnetism draws something unnatural he needs help with into his life he wonders just how true that is.

STATS
Personality:
Professional and polite, but sometimes beleaguered and a little naive. Lazaro uses his profession as a social shield. He’s ambivalent about his new ability to attract the weird but considers it a part of the trouble he has to keep from normal people.
Rage: Callousness.
Noble: Sparing what he can.
Fear: Getting led into a mess he can’t get out of (Helplessness).
Obsession: Being part of the line that keeps people civilized.
Wound Threshold: 50.

Trauma Cleaner 60%* (Substitutes for Notice, Protects Violence, Protects Helplessness.)
Weirdness Magnet 40% (Substitutes for Secrecy, Protects Unnatural, Unique - Encounters the occult with high frequency.)
Avatar: The Solid Citizen 20% (Avatar, Casts Rituals, Use Gutter Magick.)

Shock Gauges

Notches
Violence
Unnatural
Helplessness
Isolation
Self
Hardened
5
3
2
1
2
Failed
0
1
1
2
0